In the spirit of Hallowe'en, here are 30-ish scary things that could happen to all the NHL teams (in no particular order):
Montreal Canadiens: Due to the "goalie controversy", Carey Price becomes crazy and bites Jaroslav Halak's head off.
Toronto Maple Leafs: Being able to win a game.
Anaheim Ducks: Not knowing how to spend Brian Burke's bribe money.
Pittsburgh Penguins: Crosby decides to shoot every time he has the puck.
Washington Capitals: Ovechkin decides to pass every time he gets the puck.
New York Islanders: John Tavares gets hit so hard that a mask flies from his head to reveal he is really Alexandre Daigle.
Ottawa Senators: After there hot start, they slowing trickle down the standings until they are out of the playoffs (I have a feeling that I'm speaking too soon).
Philadelphia Flyers: Start playing a finesse game.
New York Rangers: Sean Avery decides to shut up for a second.
Chicago Blackhawks: Make it to the Stanley Cup Finals, only to lose automatically because of the "Marian Hossa" Rule.
Vancouver Canucks: Someone gets infected with the swine flu every time Kyle Wellwood sneezes.
Minnesota Wild: Actually being use to play the puck in the defensive zone.
Colorado Avalanche: Craig Anderson reveals that he is actually Patrick Roy trying to prevent anymore of his records being broken.
Detroit Red Wings: Start to play so bad, the Lions start taking notes from them (that was probably too harsh).
San Jose Sharks: The team makes it past the first round, leaving every player to reschedule their tee times they booked in January.
Columbus Blue Jackets: Due to Steve Mason's slow start, they bring in an unknown rookie goalie that turns out to be a Calder candidate...rinse and repeat every season.
Boston Bruins: Zdeno Chara gets emotional when the Bruins announce the signing oif his brother - Franken-Chara
Los Angeles Kings: Players develop "Twisted Neck Syndrome" when celebrities start showing up at games.
Buffalo Sabres: Hamilton gets a team.
Calgary Flames: After trading for every player on the Florida Panthers, they still can't figure out why they can't get a deep playoff run going.
Edmonton Oilers: Actually get a star player to come play with the team.
St. Louis Blues: Keith Tkachuk devours the whole team. Feeling threaten by this, Kyle Wellwood responds by eating Tkachuk.
New Jersey Devils: Brodeur gets injured again, leaving the team to (once again) rely on Scott Clemme...Oh wait, he's with Florida...the Devils are screwed.
Sun Belt Teams (Atlanta Thrashers, Carolina Hurricanes, Dallas Stars, Florida Panthers, Nashville Predators, Tampa Bay Lightning): Win the Cup.
Phoenix Coyotes: The team stays in Phoenix next season.
Hamilton ???: See Phoenix.